Dowry,doesn't mean you are ‘buying a wife’

            The idea of paying dowry from my point of view or rather from my community's angle was an act of appreciation by the guy seeking to marry to the parents who raised the lady to be married. You might say the guy was also raised by his parents, but this can be countered by the fact that it is the lady who will leave her Parents and joint another family as a full member of that family.

            It is a tradition and a cultural practice which I believe should not be discarded just because some people commercialized it, we should stick to the original meanings and symbolism that this practice represented. We should never equate it as a price, because human beings are priceless, we can never attach a price to a human being, and it should be practiced within the confines of the original intentions. Myself am yet to  pay dowry and I am sure it is a good thing to do. It is a sign to my in-laws that I love and respect their daughter and not even dowry can stand in my way of getting her!!

            Strictly speaking, nobody will force you to pay dowry, and it is not a must that you should clear it before you get married, those parents who insist on clearing it before you are given the bride are those who have commercialized it and they don't understand the meaning and what it represented traditionally.

            I am not of the idea of discarding our traditions just because we are becoming westernized, we will do this to our own peril!! you can see for yourself what is happening to those communities who have departed from their traditions. There is a breakdown of almost everything, kids no longer respect adults, kids used to be raised by the community but now it is an individual thing!! look at the rate of pregnancies we are witnessing, look at the rate of sons killing their parents!! look at the rate of divorce!!! look at the rate of single parents!! look at the rate of homosexuality and lesbianism!!,look at the number of street children !!! these were unheard of sometimes back,but because we have discarded most of our cultures and traditions, these things are rampant and they are of no good to the society.

Have you realized almost everything communities did as a cultural and tradition has been baptized with scary names? i.e.;

Dowry renamed - Bride price

Circumcision  renamed - FGM!!

Stroke discipline renamed – Corporal punishment

and many more, this is a way discouraging people from sticking to their traditions.